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thought i was a donut, ya tried to glaze me

2.05.2007

stupid bowl

Along with the Super Bowl hooplah usually comes those stupid Super Bowl boxes in offices and bars around the country. The only reason I call them stupid, though, is because I don't understand them. I'd love to make some cash just by writing my name down in "3rd Quarter-Colts--6 point" or whatever, but I've tried to grasp the concept and failed every time. Like a lot of things in life, this has gone straight over my head.

And then there's always my favorite story about the Super Bowl. A few years back some guy bet a whole lotta money on the Super Bowl, in a box in one of the local joints. The story goes, he would have won it all if there wasn't a late-quarter field goal/touchdown/2 point conversion (I don't remember what it was, don't quote me, just know it was some point change that made another team win the game). Depressed, upset, most likely drunk and now out of a lot of cash, he thought of the only logical thing he could do--kill himself. So he walked right on over the Cross Bay Bridge, found himself at the middle of it, and jumped. But instead of hitting the water he hit a pile of floating snow & ice that was leftover from a recent snow storm (remember that--snow?) Instead of dying, he just broke both his legs in Jamaica Bay. And he was still poor.

And that's what I think of everytime the Super Bowl comes around.

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I wonder if my writing has even improved?