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thought i was a donut, ya tried to glaze me



I voted for Hillary Clinton on Super Tuesday. The reason I'm writing about this is because I've been getting an unusually-high negative reaction from people when I tell them this--and not just from people I'd expect to hear it from, like my dad, but all different people. The reaction is usually something like this:

"Eww, you voted for her? Why? What's wrong with you? I hate her. I, like, totally love Obama."

I'm not going to make this an anti-Obama post because I do also admire Barack Obama, and from the way things are looking I'll be casting my vote for him come November. I was just sort of surprised from the intense feelings people have for Senator Clinton, beyond what I think is reasonable. People tell me, "Don't you think she's insincere? Doesn't she seem so fake?", but honestly, I don't see it. She's a politician--of course she's fake. Of course she'll do things that don't seem 100% genuine. But I just don't see her as being any more of these things than Barack. He's an inspiring speaker, and an inspiring candidate, but I think Hillary is, too. Maybe I'm supposed to like him over her because Will.I.Am told me so, or because ScarJo's all weepy on the mic about him (actually, that video made me like him less). I find it very in vogue to be a Barack supporter, especially by people who don't know the facts. And again, I'm not saying this makes him less qualified of a candidate just because he's cool (as you can see I'm covering my tracks with this a lot), I'm just saying that I've noticed that people who had never take an interest in politics now talking about how great Obama is. Which, duh, is one of the reasons he's so inspiring--he's getting people to give a shit, or at least pretend to. And that's been lacking lately, and we need it.

And maybe it is because she's a woman. Is it so wrong of me to look up to and gain inspiration from a woman doing big things? Say what you want--say she's in a loveless marriage kept together only for political gain, say she's a 'wench' or a 'bitch' or any of the other countless things I've heard real people say to me when I tell them who I voted for. What I see is a woman doing what was impossible not even 100 years ago, something I see with both of the candidates but again, I still find myself back with Hillary.

When I saw the video of her crying, I didn't think less of her. But you know what I did do? I cried too. I cried for all the times I thought it was hard, and I'm just a 22 year old looking for a job, not running for President. I cried because more often than not I find myself wondering if I'll ever be able to do all it is I say I want to do. I cried for every time I worried not about what I was going to say in an interview, but what I was going to wear. For all the times I thought it would be easier if I was cuter or sweeter or more beautiful or less ambitious; for all the times I looked in the mirror and wished I was somebody else. As strong as I think I am, it happens. And as strong of a woman I strive to be, I know there's always going to be a backlash, a double standard, comments from people who think I should stay home and iron their shirts instead. Or just shutup and be pretty.

There are so many woman in my life that I admire, for their strength and ambition and ability to seemingly do it all with a smile. How do they do it? I'll be trying to figure that out forever. After years of just being a girl, I''m finally embracing being a woman. And it's a big deal understanding what it means, even today, in 2008. So that's why I voted for Hillary Clinton.

But aw shucks, maybe it was just because of this:

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I wonder if my writing has even improved?