About Me

My photo
thought i was a donut, ya tried to glaze me


Swine Flu

Swine flu? From Cancun? Back when I was a kid, any surprises brought back from Spring Break could be taken care of at Planned Parenthood.


shut yo' mouth

"looking back, i should have hugged her before yelling and screaming at her."
[corner of grand & essex]

"hey, we have a sexual predator roaming our streets now. we're just like brooklyn!"
[sparrow bar, astoria]

thinking > speaking


The Bitch In The Audience From The Susan Boyle Video

You'd win "Britain's Got Makeup Talent", for sure.


"It's too bad [Dov Charney's] such a misogynist creep. He has no idea how much I love tight and bright clothes."

-Elona Jones


Later, Douchebags

[my posting is on a three-month delay]


crawling back

"For Christ's Sake, if she wasn't so open about being a lesbian, you'd swear she was sleeping with Mayor Bloomberg."

-My mom, referring to UFT president Randi Weingarten

I wonder if my writing has even improved?